Friday, January 23, 2009


There are some places where you would absolutely find one of the best theatrical dramas.The emotions are so high that they can be selected for emmy,grammy,nanny,manikchand,stardust,lux,ponds and I donot know how manyother awards.I literally think RGV picks his dummies from such places.The place I am talking about is not some broadway,highway or any way but our very own exam centres.Yes the place where people take or give exams.The place where people flock in from various forms of life to take or give exams.Now first of all there is a huge difference between giving and taking exams:but a little later.Everyone has been there experienced the thriil but has anyone noticed or observed people.(Please dont try this )

Let me introduce you to the lead actors,their main roles and the script to which they perform to deadly precision.I was just standing there at the exam centre knowing that this paper is as Boycott said "GOIN GOIN GOIN GONE Out of Queens Park oval".Then the actors come in:

(Type-I)First to come in are the scholarly types the rank holders,the honours guys,the know it all,done it all,with a Donot Disturb LOOK.They come with books,laptops(lappy the hip lingo),reference books,the reference to the reference books,and a compass(rounder the desi lingo).The compass is for poking guys like me who ask him "Hey did u read for todays paper".To which he very coolly and confidently replies "Of course man".To which I reply "Why do you need to read to read todays newspaper".A dirty grin followed by a poke with a rounder.

(Type-II)Then come the" know it all but can't remember a thing guys".Seriously these guys should be made to sit on a scud missile with a seat belt.The only thing they want to prove is that they have read nothing,only started readin from today morning (Gosh thats the limit) and now his career is destroyed and he would have to work as a waiter in his mama nu motel in the STATES.Why they do it noone knows.They know everything,they are actually disti guys (distinction holders).And to look cool they tell you he watched DDLJ last night followed by terminator 2 then rocky 5 then Jurassic park -3.After killing the last of the dinosaurs he has come to take his exams(notice take).Do you notice any pattern in the movies that he has wathced.Yes all of them have been put inHindi,Tamil,English,Gujarati,Espanyol in many channels (STAR MOVIES) for many number of times.Now I can tell you the story even backwards.

(Type-III)Then come the "Dont know a thing so how can I remember anything guys".They are the most honest type of guys,whose only aim is to cheat and pass the bloody hell.They virtually know nothing .One of them bet last night for a few bucks that he wouldnot put a dot on hte paper.And yeah he really won the bet!!!.They make airplanes of their answer sheets and fly it into the supervisor's hands.And yeah after years of practice it does land safely into their hands..The thing is that they are cool as ice.You might even mistake them for disti guys.But their early exit from examination halls confirms it.

(Type-IV)Then come "Know nothing but miraculously I remember everything" guys.Self confidence to the limit ,they enter halls like tigers ',Oh data structure' they tell you ,that's old stuff I know File Strucutre(which actually is a concept in data structure).You tell them U.S.A.,they will tell you United States Of America ,where is it located ,he will say "That's not in the syllabus".They literally know the index by heart.The only thing that they know about a concept is in which chapter is it located.After recognizing that in a paper ,all hell breaks loose .All the available answer sheets are filled,they write about anything and everything like they are on blogspot and not a examspot.They complete their papers last and hope to score about 80,only to be disappointed during results.I had written an epic on data structure why did I get marks out of 10 in a 100 marks paper.There must be some mistake with the university,the Indian government.Then the reasoning which is also an epic like his paper.He will tell that once he had brawl with a MLA's son in which he had almost killed him.To extract revenge the MLA's son told his father to destroy this guy.So the MLA called up the chief minister ,who then called the education minister,who then called the Vice chancellor ,who then calls up the senior correctiong officer(never heard of this designation:me too) to bring out the heaviest paper in the university and fail the bloody son of a dawg(lingo).So now you know how to write a 10,000 mark paper in a 100marks question(Hyperbole intended)

Atlast after the examination when all of these types meet,you can almost see remix reactions(lingo intended).Type-I are quiet and rush to conquer and decimate another subject.Type-II will tell you it was the hardest of all papers,it was out of syllabus,the 1st question was twisted(Actually it was repeated for the umpteenth time by university for Type-III guys to pass).For the first 2hrs and 45 min I was crying and only had written 1 page(can u believe it you actually feel sorry).You ask what did you do in the last 15.He tells you with a wry smile that he completed the entire paper and he is hoping to get around 90.You want to kill him but you already are worried that you are on the border hence you keep your Kalashikonov to yourself.Type -III is overjoyed ,he has won the bet and will drink a can of CHILLED beer with the money he won.Dont be mistaken he really is estactic.Type-IV will tell you the paper was damn easy.He could have passed blindfolded,one hand behind the back,potassium cynaide between his teeth and anthrax in his hand.You wonder,you question yourself ,you analyse where had you gone wrong,but with experience you will know you are safe and more certainly you are not TYPE-IV.

As for give and take figure it out for yourself.Hint:-Type I and II are takers while the rest are takers.


  1. //tell you the paper was damn easy.He could have passed blindfolded,one hand behind the back,potassium cynaide between his teeth and anthrax in his hand.

    these kinds of people normally give us (who try to extract the last drop of mark from the paper just to pass) the creeps!!!

    nice proclamations!!! :D

  2. so whats ur type??? and i know a certain type II....... "" guddu "" lol nice blog bevda.....keep it going !!!! :D


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