I am a pshycopathic killer who has been talked into by my victim the owner of the blog to write a post for this blog. Please don't ask me how the OWNER of the blog got me into this, but here I am writing for him. Actually I wanted to kill him, but I found him to be very interesting and a smooth talker, I think he should be some salesman or something but who cares I just want to write a bloody post and get outta here before my next victim completes his shower. You see I like to kill people when they are showering, really increases my brand equity.
Now the problem is that what should a man who kills three times a day write about. Hence as suggested by the owner of the blog that I should talk about the real practical problems that a psychopathic killer faces when he kills three times. Hence I would like the readers to take the following precautions when a psyhcopathic killer visits your home.
1. You shall shower three times a day, you see it maintains hygiene and gives me more chance to kill some of you guys. It really feels bad when I have to kill you in your sleep, it damages my brand equity as I mentioned before.
2. You shall at all times keep a sharp, sterilised knife at your house so that some days when my knife loses its edge after killing so many people I can use yours without hesitation.
3. Please put some light music preferably Jagjeet Singh so that it is easier for you to go into the night.
4. Keep your bathrooms clean I hate to work in dirty places.
5. Always before entering the shower say your last rites or prayers you never know when I might strike.
6. Please avoid having pets at home it hurts to send an innocent animal to hell
7. Please avoid smoking in your bath tubs because I am allergic to smoke.
8. Please avoid going into the shower full stomach cause sometimes when I am drunk, I tend to miss your heart and hit your stomach and many times your intestines get tangled into my blade hence with all that food on it, it really aids in corrosion so please have your food after your shower.
9. Please ensure clean towels and anti-bacterial liquid at your bathroom, it really aids in having clean blades.
10. And please don't have mobile phones at your bathroom where you try to call the police and I have to break your expensive phones, really it hurts the economy.
Hence these are the don'ts by a cold-blooded killer, so take care of this and death will come easier to you. And by the way this might just be the last post for this owner cause I have decided to kill this so called blogger. As it is he ain't got much visitors. Ok Bye Lov U guys.