Saturday, August 15, 2009

The I-DAY RUT

Independence Day or the I-day, the hippie likes to call it is here and gone by the night. Yet does it hold a special day for us Indians, especially for our generation who have seen a free India since their birth. Well going by my experience it is nothing but a routine holiday for us where we like to enjoy the day off. Well do not consider me to be any anti- Indian guy because lets face it that’s the truth. We only know the names of the Kranti-veers because we are forced to remember it during our history lessons in school. Its nothing bad because we have not experienced their struggle or shared their passion to see free India. All we have heard is that “"Angrezo ke zamane mein yeh hota tha or woh hota tha par kya hota tha who baad me jaye” Yes that’s true and we have to live by it.


Let me share with you the typical day an average Indian family goes through during the I-day. First of all the father gets up grumpy because he has to send his bloody kids to school for flag hoisting. He hates it because this MNC guy has just got his probably only leave for the year. Why do bloody school people have to open the schools on this day. Probably because they get summer and diwali vacations hence they do not know the value of a holiday . Damn this lazy Indian education system and damn entire academics sector who do not prepare their children for the real world which I am now experiencing.


The child gets up thinking “Shit why do I have to get up on a holiday and why did the bloody principal declare a holiday on this day when they are being called on this day. The kid is right technically. He has to get up go to school on a holiday. Now if you take the typical Indian school I-day you will see grumpy parents taking their kids to school who on this day have to stand like jerks for two hours in the hot sun just to see the flag unfurl (I could do this at home). The two hours at school is total punishment even if you are MNC guy. You have to see your most boring teacher giving the mother of all boring lectures on Indian history, culture and Krantiveer and all that stuff. And if you notice this most damned and unanimously hated lecture is to be given by the most boring monotonous teacher of your school. Then you have some chief guest who would be most probably be a school alumni and who like a college student being ragged wants to inflict the same pain and agony that he had experienced during his school days. He is applauded at his every momentary silence, cough or any sign of emotion or exhilaration that he shows which suggests that he is nearing the end of his lecture. He even points out that he understands that you are bored but somehow he is enjoying your situation.


After the chief guests sits down you have the class topper reading some verses of Khurran, Bible or Gita depending on the level of torture, it has to be just right or else you might die. Moreover adding insult to injury he explains that stuff to you. Then adding injury to your insult you have your parents comparing you with him. After all this you have two words from the principal vice principal the secretary the treasurer the clerk which extends the two hour torture to a agonizing four hour one. You get restless you start making moves , sounds , howls then eventually screams, but to no avail” bolne aaya hoon to bolke hi rahunga” This is where the average Indian starts learning to disrespect other people and starts to strive to be the worst human the world has seen.


After this four hour ordeal, there comes the mother of all ironies. The bloody chief guest gets to hoist the flag. Come on now we are the martyrs here we have spent our blood sweat tears to make this event possible unlike our Lok Sabha members who stage a walk out during such situations. We are the Krantiveers not the damn chief guest, Anyways we are just too happy to revolt like in 1857 so now we are good to go.

1 comment:

  1. lol...sweet article..i liked the humor in it...and its true too..I hated getting up early on a public holiday and go to school...a well written thought

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